So unfortunately ( or not, depending on how you see it) I did not change much from my second pitch because a lot of the students' feedback was positive in the way I had edited it from the first pitch. A lot of the comments mentioned how they loved the concept or they have had to leave pets behind, so they reinforced my pitch idea. So since none of them really gave any constructive criticism, I tried finding errors on my own. So the edits I made were that I tried to cut out some unnecessary words/details; basically cut out some fluff that was time consuming. I also put on my suit because I thought it would give me a more professional look and it did give me more confidence while giving the pitch. I also tried to be more dynamic with my hand gestures, facial expressions, and emotions instead of sounding like a robot.
Let me know what you guys think and if you have any feedback (good or bad), I am all ears!!!
Wow this video was so smooth. You definitely knew your market and target it. As a student I understand how much stress people go through. It's a great idea! I would play with them for hours! I think the pitch is directed towards people who would invest in your idea so try to change your target audience a little.
ReplyDeletehttp://notimportantrightnow.blogspot.com/2016/03/elevator-pitch-no-3.html
Hi Camila,
ReplyDeleteFirst off I love your idea. I cannot think of a better way to spend my lunch break than playing with dogs. You CANNOT be stressed out while playing with a dog, they are simply to pure. In fact your post made me a little sad because it made me miss my childhood dog. Overall I think your presentation was great, you provided facts to back you up and certainly have an original idea.
You can check out my third elevator pitch here: http://llogsdonent3003.blogspot.com/2016/03/elevator-pitch-no-3.html
Hey Camila,
ReplyDeleteSo first of all your video is the most well put together video that I have seen yet in this class. The video quality was fine but the presentation of your pitch with the inclusion of facts in the introduction was pieced together very well! As for the actual idea for your business I personally am more of a cat person than a dog person and while it would be nice to see some dogs it just isn't on my top priority list when I'm overwhelmed with other things such as my job or such. While this may appeal to many others sadly I will be a blue moon customer! Best of luck and if you wish to check out my blog feel free to at - http://derekdonahueentrepreneurship.blogspot.com/